The Feelings Department

Protect Yourself from the Glums

Stress and disappointment will grab you—if given half a chance. Guard your feelings, your up-beat moods. A dollop of joy and binkles go a long way toward keeping the blahs or sadness at bay. But why stop there?

Recognize that when it comes to emotions, there’s more going on than we choose to notice. Or define with words. Or know how to decipher. A case in point applies to blubbering and yammering (which we never do without feeling we’re “wrong).” Maybe not…

In Praise of Blubbering and Yammering (A BonBon)

Everyone experiences life in three ways—logically, emotionally and physically. Early on, we learned to let the logical side do the talking. It’s good at it and people are more likely to pay attention.

Since our logical side controls the mouth it assumes it calls the shots. But it edits out information that doesn’t make sense to it—information that isn’t rational. What it deletes is primarily related to the body and emotions.

When our emotional side tries to speak up and be “logical” it blubbers. When our physical side tries to speak up and be “logicalּ it yammers. Neither of which comes across as articulate—but that doesn’t mean the body and emotions don’t have anything worth saying.

Neither blubbering (hurt feelings) nor yammering (body hurts) come across as persuasive or coherent. To the extent their message gets through at all, it’s likely to be embarrassing for both the speaker and the listener. The point is almost always lost because it’s made so ineptly.

Our logical side wants to leap in and tidy up the information since it, too, doesn’t “get it.” That’s why the blubbering or yammering started in the first place.

So here’s the dilemma—whether to persist with belaboring the issue that’s putting you in a poor light or to drop it—let it go, resolved to “forget the whole thing.”

When it comes to verbal expression the body and emotions are woefully inept—they’re accustomed to keeping quiet. So when they do speak out—however awkwardly”pay attention. Listen. Trust there’s something being said that your logical mind didn’t notice or can’t address. But something you need to be aware of, nonetheless.

Respect the sincerity of what’s being expressed, however illogically. Don’t attempt to turn it off. Listen beyond the words, for the underlying message. Muzzle the smooth-talking logical point of view that’s eager to edit or correct. Consider the blubbered or yammered information relevant, since there’s a core of truth in it—truth that would be so easy to ignore.

It takes courage to let yourself blubber or yammer. It takes even more courage to listen and respect the perplexing message. Yet you’ll be amazed by what you’ll discover about yourself on those channels you’ve assumed carried only gibberish or static.

Tune it in, don’t tune it out.

More BonBons _____________________ Copyright © 2005, Off the Page Press
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